I don't know how to start. I don't even know how to write now. Losing you, mean losing my soul. When I'm without my soul, what is the different between live and dead?
20.01.2010 / 4.11am
U were lying there in pain. .i was the last person to see u. i missed a lot of oppurtunity which i let go and took u for granted. no body told me yr heart stopped beating. when i found out, it scared me allright. why did u leave me? didn't i tell you to be strong? didn't i tell u to fight and get up? didn't i asked u to wait and hold on? or was it really that u can't hold any longer?
i'm confused..
There's still a lot to tell. There's still a lot to show to u. There's still much that u should know. I want u to know that when u called me in pain, i heard u. And tat's y i quickly held yr hand. I want u to know, that when i held your hand, it was cold and i know u was in pain by the look of yr eyes. how i wish i can do something to make it go away. I want and I need u to feel better!
I want u to know that I still remember yr eyes, yr face and yr voice calling my name in pain. I want u to know that it disturbed me but i don't want to forget it. Lord, pls keep me reminded. When i held yr hand it was not long. I just need a lil bit more time to b with u. I'm not asking for years, just need a few hours maybe. Too much huh Lord?
but i know u tried to hold on to your best. cos when yr heart stopped beating.. u came back again and tats when i saw u and u saw me. that's when u called my name and i held yr hand. it was less than 5 min and after that u were gone. u never open yr eyes again. i wonder if u listen to every word i whispered to u.
I wanted to asked u if u love me and how much? I wanted to let u know that i love u and so much! I want u to know that i am so lonely now. I am mourning yr death. I want u to know that i am thinking of giving up now. I can't seem to think straight now. I need u like how u need me before. When i went to see u, and recite yassin for u, i wonder if i did it okay? i want u to know that i talked to u and wanted u to visit me in my dreams. I wonder if u hear..
will u ever come?
fairos syg opah. Hamidah binti Ibrahim. ampunkan dosa fairos. terima kasih bela fairos. tunggu fairos. rindunya pada opah tak terbendung lagi.
